Someone’s Confused

By the time folks “decide” to get sober, they’ve likely been tossing around the idea of quitting drinking for a long long time. There’s always a part of us, regardless how small it is, that doesn’t want to stop. And so we engage it, become confused by it, think about it, talk about it, andContinue reading “Someone’s Confused”

Chapter 4 ~ CHANGES

The following is an excerpt from my memoir Saturation. I was rarely predictable. My moods fluctuated depending on several factors: they fluctuated depending on the amount of alcohol I’d already consumed, the amount of alcohol within my reach, and the amount of alcohol that I knew I needed to buy. These were all of utmostContinue reading “Chapter 4 ~ CHANGES”

Let’s Call A Spade A Spade.

I still find it interesting when I encounter folks who have indeed relapsed but prefer to call it something else. Like a mistake. Or a slip. Or a setback. Or (insert your favorite noun) … To me, this suggests that this person hadn’t paid the full fare for the recovery train in the 1st place.Continue reading “Let’s Call A Spade A Spade.”

Preposterous!

(Preposterous! Isn’t that a great word?) Saturation continues here … It served Dick to overlook my relationship with alcohol, whatever he thought it might be, because he realized he couldn’t compete with it. Alcohol was the wrapping on the package that was ME. I made this very clear from the beginning of our relationship when,Continue reading “Preposterous!”

Please Hold. I Need To Overthink This.

What is it about the human condition that we, in general, have to make things so hard for ourselves? We overthink and over-complicate the simplest things. We’re so moved by our emotions that we’re at the mercy of them. We’re slaves to our own drives. No wonder some people suggest we only use about 10%Continue reading “Please Hold. I Need To Overthink This.”

Our AV Never Dies

It just quiets down sometimes. This is the conclusion I’ve arrived at. I read or hear about folks accumulating decades of sobriety, only to cave one day for – essentially – nothing. All that time. All that hard work – POOF – left in the past. Once a person relapses – that restarts the sobrietyContinue reading “Our AV Never Dies”

I’m Powerless Over Alcohol

Wait. No, I’m not. Who said that? I’m not powerless over alcohol. I finally stopped drinking it for good and I haven’t looked back. That took and still takes ENORMOUS strength. I feel like She-Ra (but I’m not a blond). No addict is powerless over their drug of choice. As soon as we stop –Continue reading “I’m Powerless Over Alcohol”

Why do we relapse?

It is excruciating to discover that someone has relapsed. Especially when they’ve accumulated substantial time in sobriety. What on earth happened, I wonder. How could this person give up so much hard work and so much sober time – for what? Just about anything, anyone, and any occasion can be blamed for relapsing. But ultimately,Continue reading “Why do we relapse?”

Is it Important to Experiment With Drugs?

Unless it’s in there and I can’t see it – cigarettes should be in that picture. My immediate “Go To” answer to the question of my post is a resounding YES. Then, when I think about the question for a bit, my answer is still, YES. I say Yes because I place great value onContinue reading “Is it Important to Experiment With Drugs?”