Saturation: A Memoir, Will Be Republished.

For those of you who have read my first book, Saturation, it is going to be rereleased this March. For those of you that haven’t read it – it’ll be out this March.

My story cornicles the decades I spent trying to get sober. I spent nearly 12 months in nine residential treatment centers over the span of a 23 year period. I had therapists, belonged to AA and Refuge Recovery, I had a sponsor and worked the steps, I had friends and family offering constructive criticism and support, and nothing worked for me. Not even my own ambition to get sober, and I had plenty.

I’ve had quite a few heated discussions with folks about God and whether or not the BMOC had anything to do with my getting sober. I don’t believe God stepped in. I am a firm believer in self-control and will power. This said – I still believe that God was rooting for my success. Because I do believe in God. And I do believe that God – if God can express wants – does want or hope or wish for humans to evolve. And by evolve I mean quit drinking or quit doing things that cause harm to ourselves and others.

Plenty of folks have confronted me with “Well, self-control and will power never kept me from taking a drink.” And my reply to that is this: Perhaps you’re confusing those two words with something else. If self-control and will power didn’t keep you from a drink – what did? Why would God decide to help you out when so many people on the planet are dying left and right from one disaster or another? Why YOU?

Ohhhh, that’s right. It’s not God. It’s YOU finally utilizing the self-control and will power you were BORN WITH. We all have them. These things are innate.

I prefer to believe we’re not just here as puppets with no control over the direction our lives take. Because if that IS the case – that we have zero control – I might as well just roll over and give it all up. We all might as well do that. We all oughta just let God have at it and make visible these puppet strings we’re all attached to. Except that’s never going to happen – because we all have the ability to control ourselves. We all have will power. We – many of us – just don’t know how to access and use these things.

Published by Jennifer

I've finally found my happy place in sobriety. Yay! Go Me!

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