I might make it two weeks – repeating the same things – before I start rolling my eyes and trying not to pull out the hair I have left.
There are numerous avenues that I could take around this subject- repetition – but I’m going to pick just one. It’s called “Hush up a minute while I bitch and moan about the same choices I repeatedly make.”
Now, just for the record, in case you haven’t already guessed, I can NOT STAND monotony. I cannot stand repetition. I cannot stand the knowing that I’m about to do the same effing thing that I’ve already done five, ten, twenty, fifty times. This drives me absolutely BANANAS 🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌 and I don’t write that lightly. I wind up saying to myself “FUCK!! I just DID THIS!!” My angst is so great that I usually wind up quitting whatever I’m repeatedly doing simply so that I can do something else – something new. I crave new shit – all the time.
So – how do folks do it? I don’t know. I don’t know how they can bear it. I don’t understand how folks can look at the same office, the same people, take the same drive, eat the same foods, go to the same gym, watch the same TV channel, keep the same routine (insert whatever it is you do all the freakin’ time without fail) without going bananas.
I think the real question is WHY when there are so many other opportunities and options available to choose from.
Okay – I read something on Facebook yesterday. This woman started a thread about being bored in her sobriety. She was looking for ideas from members, and she shared that while she walked, exercised, listened to music, read, blah blah yada and something else I can’t remember, she was still bored stiff. As much as I didn’t want to reread her post, I had to. I thought maybe I’d missed something, but no. She was bored.
There is SO much going on in the world that we miss when we’re intoxicated and she appeared completely oblivious to this truism. She was unable to discover ONE LITTLE THING that would improve her attitude about being sober – about the abundance of gifts life offers us in sobriety. We only have to open the eyes in our minds to see these. They’re right in front of each one of us.
Instead of opening her front door and walking outside to go do something productive, she plopped down in front of her laptop and bitched about being bored. She had absolutely no sense of an adventurous spirit. No curiosity. No ambition. Nothing.
I was utterly baffled.
She is someone who does not appear to appreciate her own life. And she’s bored. I don’t know how, but she is and I think that’s sad and pathetic and it gets under my skin.
My thinking is – “Oh yeah? You’re bored? Well, why don’t you get off your LAZY ass and go do something. CREATE something. CONTRIBUTE something. ANYTHING.”
I’ve found these two questions to be exceptionally helpful when I’m ready for my next tiny adventure, and I ask them every day – “How can I make today memorable?” and “What can I do?”.